6 Lessons I Learned Living in China

Hello, I hope you are well. First I want to give all praise to God for his mercies and kindness. God is worthy to be praised and honoured by all. Never stop praying, never stop being kind and always trust in God.

My Time in China

As I reminisce on my time in China and the great experience that I had there, I realise that there were a number of things I learnt from the people of China. I studied and worked in China for a total period of 1.5 years. I thought I would get a culture shock after a few weeks in China, but I embraced it like I had been there before. Certainly with different cultures, there are…well differences but that’s just it and you learn to adapt quickly.

As I had learnt Mandarin Chinese since the age of 11, I feel that the many years prior to travelling to China, helped gear me for life in the East. I loved it. The food was so different to the western adaptions in the UK. Very fresh and varied! The people overall were so kind, helpful and family oriented. They enjoy togetherness and being in each others company. China to me is a country that never sleeps. Various shops remain open till 11pm; trust is relatively high compared to the UK, and policing well enforced. It’s a country not without its faults but certainly a nation to be looked upon favourably rather than not. More and more Chinese people are also learning about Christ and consecrating their life to him like their forefathers in ancient times once did.

I admired how the ladies dressed. The children were dressed like adorable babes and the ladies dressed femininely and stylish. The landscape and nature across the cities I went to were so varied and the traditional buildings so intricate and unique.

So these are some of the interesting things I learned living in China.

Media is damaging and that’s why it is heavily controlled by the government

When I say media, perhaps I have to caveat and say Western media because everything goes. In the name of “free speech”, almost everything is allowed to be showed on mainstream TV. Whearas in China this is strictly controlled. I don’t know about today but when I was last in China in 2018, you still couldn’t use Western social media such as Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram and even YouTube. China had its own equivalent and had rules on what was allowed. Why? Because the government does not want the minds of its people polluted. It has seen the deterioration of morality within the West and doesn’t want China to follow, although it can never prevent it fully. It’s like the 10 commandments. There are rules and if you don’t follow them then you’ll corrupt your mind and ultimately your soul. Thus I must say that Christ is the only way to a healed mind and heart.

On this, I see a great difference in certain cities and their treatment of foreigners, especially black people. For example when I was studying in Ningbo, which at that time was a 2-tier city (ranked by GDP levels), the reception from the people there towards foreigners was interesting. As a black woman who had braids, everyone wanted to say hello to me, take pictures with me and sometimes would hand over their babies for me to pose with! They were curious about my hair and would want to touch it. They were super friendly towards me. What made them smile from ear to ear is when they heard the little Mandarin that I spoke, it was like I now stepped into their family and was accepted. Sometimes the constant pictures was an overkill but for the most part I really enjoyed their hospitality and warmness.

Now compared to Guangzhou, a huge economic hub and urban society close to Hong Kong, the reception I received from the people there was starkly different. I received a lot of unfriendly stares. There were suspicions, subtle animosity vibes in the air and overall I didn’t feel that welcomed in Guangzhou. But I still had a wonderful time because I had such fun colleagues, I was staying with my relatives and the food was so delicious! Plus as is the case with most places in China, there’s lots to do. But my point is that, because Guangzhou is a well-known international hub, foreigners rub shoulders with the locals more. Then, the locals catch wind of Western social media and find ways to access it. They learn things that are heavily biased and full of prejudice about certain peoples and cultures and full of corrupt ideologies. They learn about behaviours and tactics that don’t lend to a thriving society but ultimately dismantles it. Then instead of looking at what’s in front of them, they take the ‘news’, which can be overly exaggerated and falsified as truth.

Togetherness is encouraged not avoided

After graduating, I went straight to China to do an internship. The first day, we all went to lunch together and I thought that it was because of that. But we often would eat together at a restaurant, especially as the food was so affordable and tasty. We would usually get a number of plates and share it all together as opposed to getting individual plates. I really liked this because it instils the good practice of sharing with others, plus you get to try different dishes in one sitting. My cousin’s grandma, during the weekends or during the holidays would takes us all out to have Yum Cha, which is essentially Dim Sum. This is such a popular pastime in southern China, where you go to a restaurant (usually banquet style) and order small bites for brunch. Your selection is placed together on a lazy Suzy table and everyone takes a share for themselves. It really brings everyone together; the service is great, the portions are much bigger than in the West and the food absolutely tantalising.

China is very family-oriented and respectful

Thankfully the one-child policy has been abolished, but for millennia, China has greatly valued family. Like African cultures, respect for parents is of utmost importance. Honouring your father and mother is taken seriously. Children also take pride in looking after their parents when they are unable to look after themselves. Even today, many households in China are multi-generational. Historically China built many courtyards homes to facilitate this in order to respect privacy but to maintain harmony amongst different generations. It was so pleasant to see so many grandparents taking strolls with their children and grandchildren on the streets. It seems to be such a popular pastime for families to just take strolls outside, which is not something I see so much in the West and I think that is partly because of how societies have been built i.e. the suburbs. The newer suburbs in the UK for example tend to lack places of convenience such as squares, shops, gardens for people to walk to. Suburbs tend to be, though not a great problem, sleepy towns that don’t incentivise just going out for a stroll, partly because it lacks a buzz. Plus most importantly some suburbs lack greenery, thus the walk wouldn’t be quite as picturesque as one would hope, compared to the older quaint villages of Great Britain.

What I liked about China was that even though the cities are full of skyscraper apartments (I personally don’t like this), there are so many shops almost on every street where you can sit down and buy food, grocery shop, buy clothes and more. These are ways the community comes together and enjoys each other’s company whether passively or actively. Children are out till late because the atmosphere is safe and trust is high, and its contributes to the harmony of a society when people of all ages can come together in peace.

Children in China

Children are adored and treated like little princes and princess. This is partly because of the decades long one-child policy, but the wellbeing and prosperity of children has always been largely greatly encouraged. Parents do so much for their children, sometimes to a fault in ensuring the best for their child. The best education they can provide; extra-curricular activities; and more in their early years. I think back to what my mum did for me and my siblings to ensure we went to the best schools. At one point my mum when to the council to protest about the initial secondary school they offered me, with tears because she believed that I deserved to go to the first choice she had for me – and she succeeded, with much prayer and supplication – The council made a mistake! The secondary school I went to paved the way for me to learn Mandarin Chinese all the way to GCSEs and beyond, all because of my mum wanting the best for me.

Nowadays from what I see on Chinese social media, I see that there are so many things for children to do, even more than for the adults. Fun spaces, outdoor parks, amusement parks and more. It really makes China out to be an ideal place to raise a family.

Women dress femininely

Now I must caveat, that urban trends are becoming more popular in China, but when last I was there in 2018 and especially back in 2013 I saw that women dressed really nicely and femininely. They regularly wore dress and skirts and admired looking pretty. I took so many mental notes, because their daily outfits looked so effortlessly put together. This I think is mainly down to the businesses. Clothing companies usually run based on how the owner wishes society to present themselves. This is evidently seen in China. Whereas in the West, more and more clothing companies stock clothes based on what they think society wants to dress like and they take inspiration from the runway or from celebrity cultures – and it’s not always the best, and especially not timeless.

Growing up, my mum dressed us mainly in pretty girly clothes. I still see that being the case in China, but it’s also like that in countries like Spain. I do think dressing children in age-appropriate clothes is making a comeback in the UK however. Furthermore, back in the day in London, there would be numerous boutique shops where you could buy lovely shoes, handbags – accessories in general. Whereas today, they say the high street is dead and it’s only really the big chain stores that are on the streets now.

Important to note is that I could see how the women dressed had an affect on how men behaved; and vice-versa how the men behaved had an impact on the way women dressed. I saw that men behaved more masculinely, you could smell the pride to showcase how protective they were of their girlfriends and wives. There were many examples that I observed:

• Holding them in a protective manner when just crossing the road
• Holding their bag – The West may see that as pathetic, but I frequently saw this in China
• I saw many men carrying their babies and children. Since COVID this has changed massively in the UK and I see a lot more involved fathers, but back in 2013 and even in 2018 I rarely saw this
• Great respect for pregnant women, and women in general. Getting up for them to sit down on public transport for example

The Gospel must continue to be preached in China

The first time I visited China in 2013, I was so fortunate to have a church to go to. I was quite sure that this wasn’t going to be the case and I would have to tune in online. But I and some of my classmates would be picked up by a minibus and taken to the local church about 30 minutes away where a wonderful preacher from Australia would preach to us the word of God every Sunday. We would sing praises to God, hear a great sermon and then we would all eat and fellowship with each other. It was wonderful to get to know people from all over the world who shared a belief in Jesus Christ.

Unfortunately however, as mandated by the Chinese government, Chinese locals are not allowed to worship together with foreigners. This meant that our Chinese classmates who had a curiosity about Jesus Christ could not be invited to come to church with us. They would have to go to a Chinese only Christian church. And there were a few that we spoke with, who you clearly could see were keen to know more about Jesus Christ as they hadn’t even heard about him before. The majority of those we spoke with felt that something was missing in their life and that they needed spiritual support but didn’t know what it was and Buddhism wasn’t the answer.

My Dissertation on Engagement of Chinese Students in the UK Church

I did a dissertation on the engagement of Chinese students in the local UK church. It was a wonderful piece of research I conducted – God really helped me. It made me realise so many things. Many Chinese students, because of the Chinese government, hadn’t even heard about Jesus Christ until they went abroad. A minority learnt about Him through their parents or relatives. What they loved about church in the UK was the warmth and numerous activities it organised to bring people together. I studied in Nottingham and so many of the churches that I conducted my research on, proactively catered to international students as well as the locals. Many Chinese students became Christians after attending church for a few Sundays. What first was an incentive to make new friends, practice their English and have fun; in turn led to them learning about Jesus Christ and their need for them to believe in him as their Lord and Saviour.

However from speaking to the church leaders, there were a few students who after going back to China couldn’t find a church similar to the one in the UK or which lacked the same warmth, left the faith. This reminded me of the parable of the seeds. The test came when they were faced with trials; the trial being lack of love or ‘fun’ from the church. These things were their only source of joy instead of God and so they quickly forsook Him because they looked for him in the wrong ground to start with. Our true faith comes from hearing the word of God and through things that cannot be seen. Faith comes through truly believing that Jesus Christ died for you and is the source of all our happiness and strength, even in times of great difficulty. What we Christians have to endeavour to do is always show love to others and make people feel welcome even if they are note yet believers. We must pray for them and strive to be Godly examples so that we are not a hindrance to people coming to Jesus Christ. This world is not our home and we hope for life in eternal bliss with Jesus Christ in the new heaven and earth, so lets do our best for God in the short time we have. I am sooo looking forward to that new start of eternal life with Jesus!

China isn’t Perfect, But it is A Pleasant Place to Be

So, I’m selling China to you as the place to be aren’t I? China isn’t perfect, and the West has no problem trying to paint it in the worst possible way, but guess where will be perfect? Heaven. Heaven, or to be specific the new earth and new heaven is going to be so incredibly out of this world I don’t think we’ll know how to handle it. But I guess we will because we will forget the past. But perhaps we certainly will be wowed every single day, especially as Jesus Christ will be right there in the centre. The glory, the magnificent – we will praise him and adore him everyday for his goodness towards us. No more death, no more sadness, no more darkness, no more pain. No more wickedness or sorrows. No disabilities or sickness. Everything will be incorruptible and made perfect. God said, no one has seen or heard what he has created for those that love him. Isn’t that extremely exciting? But it’s only for those who have taken up their cross and followed Jesus Christ. That’s the only requirement, yet so many will not take the opportunity whilst they can. I hope that won’t be you. Today’s the day of Salvation – please my friend if I’m talking to you – do not delay.